Step Ten

"Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it."

Step Ten begins: "AS we work the first nine Steps, we prepare ourselves for the adventure of a new life. But when we approach Step Ten we commence to put our A.A. way of living to practical use, day by day, in fair weather or foul." The Big Book states that "[w]e vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past." (Page 84) Thus, both books indicate that a new phase of recovery begins here. Where the Big Book emphasizes God removing our fear, resentment and the like, the Twelve and Twelve proposes a positive goal: "[C]an we stay sober, keep in emotional balance, and live to good purpose under all conditions?" (Page 88)

Like the Big Book, the Twelve and Twelve emphasizes that this Step is an ongoing process. In the first few pages we see such phrases as "continuous look at our assets and liabilities", "self-searching becomes a regular habit", "patiently and persistently" correct what is wrong, "habit of accurate self-appraisal", "our inventories become a regular part of everyday living" and the like.

The author introduces what has now become a familiar idea, "the emotional hangover, the direct result of yesterday’s and sometimes today’s excesses of negative emotion— anger, fear, jealousy, and the like. If we would live serenely today and tomorrow, we certainly need to eliminate these hangovers." (Page 88) The self-appraisal/inventory that should now be a regular habit helps us maintain emotional balance (sometimes called emotional sobriety): "When our inventory is carefully taken, and we have made peace with ourselves, the conviction follows that tomorrow’s challenges can be met as they come." (Page 89)

There are three types of inventory discussed in the Twelve and Twelve, alike in principle but distinguished by the time factor. The spot-check inventory taken any time of day that we become disturbed. This is the equivalent of the Big Book's suggestion that we "[c]ontinue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear." (Page 84) Then there is the nightly inventory, discussed in the Big Book under Step Eleven (Page 86) but included in the Twelve and Twelve as part of Step Ten, possibly to treat the inventory idea consistently. Finally, there is an entirely new kind of inventory named here, the periodic, annual or semiannual inventory to be taken alone or with a sponsor or spiritual advisor. The optional participation of a sponsor in this occasional activity is the only mention in this Step. There is no suggestion whatever that a sponsor help with the spot check or nightly inventory. As part of the periodic inventory, many A.A.'s go on an "occasional retreat from the outside world where we can quiet down for an undisturbed day or so of self-overhaul and meditation." (Page 89) The author assures us from experience that minutes and hours spent in meditation and self-examination will pay off handsomely by making the rest of our day better and happier. The periodic inventory or retreat is an entirely new idea, one which is not found in the Big Book. A connection between meditation and self-examination can also be found in Step Eleven in this book. (Page 98)

In discussing the spot-check inventory of daily disturbances, the author writes one of the most cited lines of this Step and indeed of the entire book: "It is a spiritual axiom that every time we are disturbed, no matter what the cause, there is something wrong with us." (Page 90) One is reminded of the Big Book's Step Four idea that resentment is the "number one offender", for "[f]rom it stem all forms of spiritual disease..." (Page 64) and "[W]hen harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit." (Page 66) So-called 'justified' anger is seen as equally harmful in both books. The Twelve and Twelve continues: "Anger, that occasional luxury of more balanced people, could keep us on an emotional jag indefinitely. These emotional 'dry benders' often led straight to the bottle. Other kinds of disturbances— jealousy, envy, self-pity, or hurt pride— did the same thing." (Page 90) A spot-check inventory is especially useful at such times, and is aimed at daily ups and downs, not at consideration of long-standing difficulties. There is no suggestion in the Twelve and Twelve, as there is in the Big Book, that we talk to someone when we feel disturbed.

Development of self-restraint is the first objective. When we speak or act in these times of disturbance we lose our ability to be fair-minded and could ruin our relations with others (relations we have just begun to repair in Steps Eight and Nine). "Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen. We must avoid quick-tempered criticism and furious, power-driven argument. The same goes for sulking or silent scorn... For we can neither think nor act to good purpose until the habit of self-restraint has become automatic." (Page 91) Another emotional booby trap is prideful self-confidence when we achieve importance and material success. We can protect ourselves from "big-shot-ism" by remembering that our success and sobriety are more God's work than ours. This sounds like humility as discussed thoroughly in Step Seven, though the idea is not explicitly mentioned in this chapter.

"Finally, we begin to see that all people, including ourselves, are to some extent emotionally ill as well as frequently wrong, and then we approach true tolerance and see what real love for our fellows actually means." (Page 92) This echoes two sentiments from the Big Book: "We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick." (Page 66, Step Four) and "Love and tolerance of others is our code." (Page 84, Step Ten) "Such a radical change in our outlook will take time, maybe a lot of time." (Page 92) Compare to the Big Book passage: "Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime." (Page 84) The Twelve and Twelve goes on: "We can’t stand it if we hate deeply. The idea that we can be possessively loving of a few, can ignore the many, and can continue to fear or hate anybody, has to be abandoned, if only a little at a time." (Page 92-93)

Action is a part of this Step, as in the Big Book. "We can try to stop making unreasonable demands upon those we love. We can show kindness where we had shown none. With those we dislike we can begin to practice justice and courtesy, perhaps going out of our way to understand and help them." (Page 93) "Courtesy, kindness, justice, and love are the keynotes by which we may come into harmony with practically anybody." (Page 93) This is another reminder of the Big Book's statement that "[l]ove and tolerance of others is our code." (Page 84) It is suggested that we pause when in doubt, a variation of perhaps the most often mentioned advice in our literature. He then cites the Golden Rule by suggesting we ask ourselves, “Am I doing to others as I would have them do to me— today?” (Page 93)

The author then discusses the nightly inventory, beginning with a suggestion to take note of positive things we have done or tried to do during the day. This idea is absent from the Big Book's treatment of the nightly inventory, which concentrates solely on things that need to be corrected or forgiven. (Page 86) Consideration of things we have done well during the day is consistent with the Twelve and Twelve's chapter on Step Four, in which we see the suggestion that the sponsor might emphasize the newcomer's positive qualities to encourage balance during the inventory process. (Page 46) "Good intentions, good thoughts, and good acts are there for us to see. Even when we have tried hard and failed, we may chalk that up as one of the greatest credits of all." (Page 93)

In taking note of our shortcomings during the day, "we should carefully examine our motives in each thought or act that appears to be wrong. In most cases our motives won’t be hard to see and understand. W hen prideful, angry, jealous, anxious, or fearful, we acted accordingly, and that was that." (Page 94) But in other instances it may take more scrutiny to determine our motives. We may rationalize bad conduct with excuses. "This odd trait of mind and emotion, this perverse wish to hide a bad motive underneath a good one, permeates human affairs from top to bottom. This subtle and elusive kind of self-righteousness can underlie the smallest act or thought." (Page 94)

"Learning daily to spot, admit, and correct these flaws is the essence of character-building and good living." (Page 95) We see in this statement that Step Ten is in one way a continuation of Steps Six and Seven, which emphasize character-building, though the author himself does not make this connection. One is also reminded of Step Twelve's idea of practicing these principles in all our affairs.

As with all of the Steps in the Twelve and Twelve, there is a concise Summary of this Step near the end.

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