Chapter Six - Into Action |
The discussion in this chapter proceeds directly from the topic at the end of the previous one and poses the question:
This use of "action" is the first associated with a specific part of the program of recovery, clearly referring to Step Five. Aptly enough, this Step opens the current chapter, entitled Into Action. Previous uses in this book have referred to the overall program. (Pages 9 and 42 - "program of action" - in particular, as well as Page 17) It seems a fair interpretation that in the Big Book, the Fifth Step is the first to require action in this sense - it is first "action Step". The word "action" is not used in this sense in discussing Steps Three and Four in the previous chapter, and the first two Steps do not have explicit directions, as we have already observed. Although Steps Three and Four have suggestions that we might have the help of others (Pages 63 and 69-70, respectively), the Fifth Step is the first one to actually require the participation of another human being.
Also notable is that we have ascertained "in a rough way" what the trouble is. This echoes wording on the previous page concerning our inventory, that if we have made an list of our "grosser handicaps" we have made a "good beginning" (Page 71) Both passages suggest that complete knowledge of all our defects is not needed, at least at this point, for us to continue.
The discussion then proceeds as to why talking to another human being is so important to recovery. "The best reason first: If we skip this vital step, we may not overcome drinking." (Page 72) This is actually the only reason mentioned in the Big Book, though it is certainly a compelling one. "Trying to avoid this humbling experience, they have turned to easier methods ['an easier, softer way'?]. Almost invariably they got drunk... [T]hey had not learned enough of humility, fearlessness and honesty, in the sense we find it necessary, until they told someone else all their life story." (Page 72-73) The authors use the analogy of an actor to describe the alcoholic: "More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see." (Page 73) But he knows he doesn't deserve the reputation he seeks and is worried that people will find out what he has done and represses these memories. "He is under constant fear and tension— that makes for more drinking." (Page 73) Even psychologists, who try to help, cannot reach the alcoholic: "Unwilling to be honest with these sympathetic men, we were honest with no one else." (Page 73)
The authors then transition to a consideration of the person to share our troubles with. "We must be entirely honest with somebody if we expect to live long or happily in this world. Rightly and naturally, we think well before we choose the personor persons with whom to take this intimate and confidential step." Suggestions include someone ordained by an established religion (whether or not we belong to one), or a "a close-mouthed, understanding friend" - perhaps our doctor, psychologist or a family member. Reflecting the last clause of Step Nine, we are cautioned against sharing confessions to people who may be affected by the revelation. "We have no right to save our own skin at another person’s expense. Such parts of our story we tell to someone who will understand, yet be unaffected. The rule is we must be hard on ourself, but always considerate of others." (Page 74) The authors write that delay on this Step is permitted, but only if there is no suitable person available, then list the necessary qualities to look for: "...[W]e are very anxious that we talk to the right person. It is important that he be able to keep a confidence; that he fully understand and approve what we are driving at; that he will not try to change our plan... He should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death
errand. Most people approached in this way will be glad to help; they will be honored by our confidence." (Page 74-75) Although someone ordained is the first option mentioned for someone to hear us, and our chosen partner should be understanding, there is no specific recommendation that he or she be especially well-versed in spiritual matters or knowledgeable about our method of taking inventory.
Next the actual discussion with our chosen partner takes place. "We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, every dark cranny of the past." (Page 75) There is no direct indication that our partner give advice or feedback in any way; his or her role appears entirely passive. The alcoholic is portrayed as taking the lead in selecting his listener, explaining the task at hand, then talking to that person, with no mention of listening to him. After taking this Step, we receive several spiritual benefits, as we have seen in the previous two Steps. These Fifth Step Promises include emotional and spiritual effects, and possible removal of the alcohol problem. There is no explicit mention of gaining further practical insight into ourselves or our defects by sharing them with another person. However, this may be implied when the authors assert early in the chapter that we gain "humility, fearlessness and honesty" from this Step. (Page 73)
The authors conclude this Step:
This is the only suggested prayer in the Fifth Step. There are no directions in the Big Book on how or when to admit our faults to God, even though it is an essential part of the Step. We are asked here simply to give thanks and make sure we are prepared for the next Step.
There is no indication in the book that this Step should be repeated.
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Steps Six, Seven and Eight were not included in the original Six Step program of recovery used by the Founders, and stand out as the least developed of the Twelve Steps as we now know them. Consisting of only one paragraph each, all three can be found on Page 76 of this book.
Being primarliy concerned with the quality, practice and effects of willingness, they are introspective. They can hardly be called action Steps, despite the title of this chapter. Of Steps Three through Eleven, these alone do not suggest getting help from other people. These Steps, with the attitude of willingness they provide, appear to create a transition between action Steps Five (confession of defects) and Nine (restitution or amends for actions based on these defects); these two acts were consecutive Steps in the original program used by the Pioneers. Steps Six, Seven and Eight, unlike the others in this chapter and the preceding one, do not contain any promises, which are elements of a gradual spiritual awakening.
Step Six has us look at what we have done in Steps Four and Five, in which we named and discussed our defects of character. Since we ourselves have made the inventory of our harmful and undesirable traits, it folows that we would be willing to have these removed. But the authors seem to anticipate that there will be some resistance. We might infer that rationalization or some other kind of self-centered thinking is involved here. We ask God for help to be willing when finding ourselves clinging to something.
Step Seven is one of three Steps that has a prayer with suggested wording associated with it (The others are Three and Four). This prayer is the essence of the Step itself, as in Three. It is notable that in the Seventh Step Prayer we express our willingness to have defects of character removed before making the actual request. The subject matter of the this prayer, is of course, those defects of character dealt with in Steps Four and Five, while the Third Step Prayer has as its subject the self-will discussed in Step Three itself.
Step Three also has the observation that "[w]e thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready." (Page 63) Step Six can be seen as the equivalent of thinking well before taking Step Seven.
Step Eight is introduced together with Step Nine in the middle of Page 76. However, the authors begin a discussion of the actual approach to others after a single paragraph, and are thus exploring Step Nine at that point. We have already seen in the last of the Fourth Step Promises that "[w]e have listed the people we have hurt by our conduct, and are willing to straighten out the past if we can." (Page 70) But the authors anticipate possible resistance, as in Step Six. The remedy we have just seen two paragraphs above is now suggested again: "If we haven’t the will to do this [make amends], we ask until it comes." (Page 76)
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Step Nine begins after the single paragraph devoted solely to Step Eight. The amount of detail make this one of the longest Steps in the Big Book, about equal in length to Step Four, with both being second only to Step Twelve in length. The specific examples cited all revolve around the home and workplace, seemingly the parts of life the authors want to emphasize, as each has a chapter devoted to it later in the Big Book. As with Step Five, this is certainly an action Step and requires the participation of others - though this time as the beneficiaries, not as partners. And like Step Five, we may have to delay action due to circumstances, but we are advised not to rationalize out of fear or reluctance.
As we begin to make amends, we have a short term goal in mind, and a larger one as well: "At the moment we are trying to put our lives in order. But this is not an end in itself. Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us." (Page 77) It is not usually wise to approach someone we have hurt and say that we have 'gone religious', as we may prevent a future opportunity to carry a spiritual message. Recall Bill's initial reaction to Ebby when the latter said, "I've got religion." (Page 9) The person we are approaching may not be in need of a spiritual solution, as Bill was, "[b]ut our man is sure to be impressed with a sincere desire to set right the wrong. He is going to be more interested in a demonstration of good will than in our talk of spiritual discoveries." (Page 77) This can be seen as a suggestion to focus on the other person's needs, rather than our agenda, however well-intentioned it may be. We are willing to talk about our spiritual convictions tactfully when it will serve a good purpose.
Approaching someone we have hated is harder than going to a friend, but is more beneficial. "It may be he has done us more harm than we have done him and, though we may have acquired a better attitude toward him, we are still not too keen about admitting our faults... We go to him in a helpful and forgiving spirit, confessing our former ill feeling and expressing our regret." (Page 77) A direct and categorical statement follows: "Under no condition do we criticize such a person or argue." (Page 77) "His faults are not discussed. We stick to our own." (Page 78) These passages remind us of earlier statements in Step Four that suggest we take only our own inventory. (Page 67) As we are using the amends list derived from the fourth column of our Fourth Step inventory, it is natural that Fourth Step considerations are relevant here.
In the authors' experience, the other person often admits fault and disagreements end after years. Failure to make progress with others is rare, and we often receive praise and good wishes from former enemies and even offers of help. But we should not be deterred if someone does refuse to accept our gesture, for we have done our part.
It is important to face our creditors, a common issue among alcoholics. An honest approach usually produces a favorable reaction, as with others we face. We make the best arrangements we can and let them know we are sorry. "We must lose our fear of creditors no matter how far we have to go, for we are liable to drink if we are afraid to face them." (Page 78)
We may have committed crimes that might bring about a jail sentence. Though we have admitted this in confidence to another person, we now face the possibility of having to reveal this to others who have been affected. Failure to pay alimony or padding the company expense account are given as potential examples. "Although these reparations take innumerable forms, there are some general principles which we find guiding. Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to find a spiritual experience, we ask that we be given strength and direction to do the right thing, no matter what the personal consequences may be." (Page 79) We may lose our reputation or face jail, "but we are willing. We have to be. We must not shrink at anything." (Page 79) The authors give the example of a man known to them who had remarried and was delinquent in alimony to the first wife, who had obtained an arrest warrant for him. The authors advised that he should be willing to face jail if necessary, but as both families would suffer, they offered another solution. He sent an apologetic letter, admitted his fault, and enclosed some money. The situation was settled as a result.
Difficult amends, or those which could affect others need special consideration. "Before taking drastic action which might implicate other people we secure their consent. If we have obtained permission, have consulted with others, asked God to help and the drastic step is indicated we must not shrink." (Page 80) As with Steps Three and Four, we may benefit from another's help or advice in taking this one in some circumstances. The example given is of a businessman man who accepted a sum of money from his bitterly-hated rival, and later denied it, effectively ruining him. The businessman felt that he would never be able to make things right again. If he spoke up he would destroy his partner's reputation, disgrace his family and wreck his career. After talking with his wife and partner,"[h]e saw that he had to place the outcome in God’s hands or he would soon start drinking again, and all would be lost anyhow." (Page 80) He stood up in church, and explained the situation in the past. He received widespread approval and years later is one of the most trusted citizens in town.
Marital infidelity is a common type of trouble for alcoholics, though perhaps not more than other people. Regardless of the circumstances, the situation must be dealt with. "If she knows in a general way that we have been wild, should we tell her in detail? Undoubtedly we should admit our fault... We are sorry for what we have done and, God willing, it shall not be repeated. More than that we cannot do; we have no right to go further." (Page 81) Naming the other woman would involve her, and the authors feel we have no right to do that. They emphasize that this design for living is a two-way street, that if we can forget then so can she. "It may be that both will decide that the way of good sense and loving kindness is to let by-gones be by-gones. Each might pray about it, having the other one’s happiness uppermost in mind." (Page 82) This passage concerns mutual forgiveness, and hints at cooperation in improving the marriage. This theme will be continued in To Wives and The Family Afterward.
In the absence of complicated situations, some alcoholics feel they need not make any special effort to clean up the past. "Sometimes we hear an alcoholic say that the only thing he needs to do is to keep sober. Certainly he must keep sober, for there will be no home if he doesn’t. But he is yet a long way from making good to the wife or parents whom for years he has so shockingly treated." (Page 82) The alcoholic is compared to a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others, wreaking emotional havoc on those around him. "We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough. He is like the farmer who came up out of his cyclone cellar to find his home ruined. To his wife, he remarked, 'Don’t see anything the matter here, Ma. Ain’t it grand the wind stopped blowin’?'’’ (Page 82)
"A remorseful mumbling that we are sorry won’t fill the bill at all. We ought to sit down with the family and frankly analyze the past as we now see it, being very careful not to criticize them. Their defects may be glaring, but the chances are that our own actions are partly responsible." (Page 83) Again, we are asked not to criticize others and look only at our part in the past. We should take action in mending our home situation, not merely say what we think are the right things. "The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it." (Page 83) One is reminded of the phrase used and paraphrased several times in the Big Book, "Faith without works is dead." Just as we should not approach others with the spiritual feature up front, we should not lecture our family about such matters. "Our behavior will convince them more than our words. We must remember that ten or twenty years of drunkenness would make a skeptic out of anyone." (Page 83)
Some situations can never be rectified. If we are willing to do so, we need not worry. For those we cannot see in person, we can send a letter (or Email!). Delay may be justified in some cases, but we must be sure there is a valid reason. "We should be sensible, tactful, considerate and humble without being servile or scraping. As God’s people we stand on our feet; we don’t crawl before anyone." (Page 83)
The Step ends with the longest, most varied and most widely cited set of Promises in the Big Book. There are twelve of them, taking up around half a page. Together with a statement early in the Tenth Step and the Tenth Step Promises, there is reason to believe that a major spiritual change takes place around this point in the program of recovery.
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The discussion of Step Ten, the first of the so-called Maintenance Steps, consists of three paragraphs spanning about one and a half pages. It is one of the shortest Steps, but is very detailed and full of meaning. The first paragraph is on Page 84 and has eleven sentences, each of which contains instructions or notes on our progress. These will be analyzed separately.
"This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along." The use of "continue" twice in this sentence clearly suggests an ongoing process. None of the earlier Steps contain such language: this Step is the first in the Big Book meant to be practiced more than once, or on a regular basis. The mention of "new" mistakes also indicates that we are concerned with the present, not the past, as has been the case with the earlier Steps.
"We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past." The past tense in the last part implies that we are finished with the cleaning up process, that it is not an endless task. This part seems to refer to Steps Four through Nine, which are concerned in one way or another with the past.
"We have entered the world of the Spirit." This sentence is highly significant, indicating a major spiritual change that occurs at this point in recovery. Coming immediately after the lengthy and wide ranging Ninth Step Promises, it seems a fair conclusion that at this point we experience the psychic change, or spiritual awakening needed for recovery.
"Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness." Over and above the general statement of purpose in the first sentence, we see that we are being asked to do more than establish certain habits in daily life.
"This is not an overnight matter." We see another indication that this Step is an ongoing process, and perhaps that growth will not begin right away.
"It should continue for our lifetime." Not only is this not a one time activity, we are never actually finished with this Step.
"Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear." This is the fourth use of "continue" in this paragraph, indicating yet again that this is not a one time activity, as are the earlier Steps. This sentence provides a specific method for implementing the general instruction in the first sentence. Resentment and fear both have separate inventories devoted to them in Step Four. Selfishness and dishonesty (as well as fear) come up in the sex inventory. As we are asked in Step Four to treat sex as we would our other problems, by extension these can crop up in all areas of life. Thus, the Tenth Step truly does continue the activities of the Fourth Step.
"When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them." This instruction implies that we are aware of these states of mind, and instead of indulging them we pause in order to make this request. As this may happen to us at any time and perhaps many times in a day, this spiritual tool would seem to be the one most often used.
"We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone." Like Steps Five and Nine, Ten is an action Step which necessarily involves others. As with Step Five, another person is required to help us take this one, and as with Step Nine, others will be the beneficiaries of our actions. There is no suggestion that we talk with anyone in particular, such as our friend or partner from Step Five, for example. Nor is there any indication we ought to consult the same person on a regular basis, only that we talk to "someone."
"Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help." It is not clear whether this means to help another alcoholic or to be of use to others around us. In either case, we are called to action that benefits others.
"Love and tolerance of others is our code." This oft-quoted statement is at once an instruction as well as an aspiration.
The second paragraph contains the Tenth Step Promises on Pages 84 and 85. They are about the same length as the Ninth Step Promises, though more limited in scope and cited less often in the rooms. They begin: "And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone—even alcohol." There is an implied peace and serenity consistent with the earlier Promises, in addition to an end of the alcohol problem. "For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor." Thus, at this stage of recovery Step Two has come to fruition. "If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame." At Step Ten we now have "the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove" that we lacked at the beginning.(Page 24) We are then told in different ways that this new attitude toward liquor is not the result of our own will: it has been given to us "without any thought or effort on our part", it has happened "automatically", "we have not even sworn off", it "just comes!" Because of this new sanity we have been granted, we have been "placed in a position of neutrality— safe and protected", "the problem has been removed", it "does not exist for us", and "[w]e are neither cocky nor are we afraid" regarding alcohol.
The third paragraph of Step Ten (Page 85) contains both a caution and a further instruction. The authors ask us not to become complacent or rest on our laurels. Alcohol is a subtle foe, we are told. "We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition." (Hence the possible reason Steps Ten through Twelve are called the Maintenance Steps) This appears to be the only passage in either of our major books to endorse the idea that we stay sober one day at a time. Next we see a suggestion on how to maintain what we have just been given. "Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will." This appears to be the first mention of God's will in the present tense, as a current fact of our lives. We have previously seen in the Prayers for Step Three, Step Four, and Step Seven requests that we presently may do "Thy will" or "Thy bidding", expressing a hope for the future. The last two sentences are the end of the Step, and represent a rare positive reference to our will.
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As the authors transition to a discussion of Step Eleven, we see a short, but significant set of Promises: "If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit
into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense." (Page 85) Further progress on these qualities is the topic of Step Eleven, and requires "more action", consisting of prayer and meditation. Despite the inspirational language used here, the discussion which follows is practical, and appears to focus entirely on the nature of our thoughts, feelings and actions. There is little of the theological, metaphysical or abstract to be found in the remainder of the chapter. This Step corresponds to the last of the Original Six Steps. The earlier version suggested that we ask for the power to "practice these precepts", which reminds us of the last clause of Step Twelve, and is consistent with the current Step Eleven idea of asking for the power to carry out His will for us.
The first "definite and valuable" suggestion concerns a nightly inventory of the day just finished. There is a series of questions to be answered, not unlike those proposed in the Fourth Step:
The second suggestion regards morning meditation. There is more detail and space devoted to this than the nightly inventory:
As with Step Three, praying with others is desirable if circumstances warrant. We may have religious obligations regarding morning devotions, or if not we might memorize certain prayers that emphasize these principles. There are also many helpful books to aid us in these endeavors.
Application of this Step is not confined to the beginning and end of the day: "As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day 'Thy will be done.'’’ (Page 87-88) Like Step Ten, this Step is not only to be practiced on an ongoing basis, but continuously throughout the day. As we are no longer trying to arrange life to suit ourselves (practicing self-will), we are in less danger of falling prey to negative emotions or foolish decisions, and we become more efficient and energetic.
Step Eleven concludes with this summary, which could just as well refer to the entire chapter: "We alcoholics are undisciplined. So we let God discipline us in the simple way we have just outlined." (Page 88)
Having made our personal inventory, what shall we do about it?
We have been trying to get a new attitude, a new relationship
with our Creator, and to discover the obstacles in our path.
We have admitted certain defects; we have ascertained in a rough
way what the trouble is; we have put our finger on the weak items
in our personal inventory. Now these are about to be cast out.
This requires action on our part, which, when completed, will
mean that we have admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another
human being, the exact nature of our defects. This brings us to the
Fifth Step in the program of recovery mentioned in the preceding chapter. (Page 72)
Returning home we find a place where we can be
quiet for an hour, carefully reviewing what we have
done. We thank God from the bottom of our heart
that we know Him better. Taking this book down
from our shelf we turn to the page which contains the
twelve steps. Carefully reading the first five proposals
we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building
an arch through which we shall walk a free man
at last. Is our work solid so far? Are the stones properly
in place? Have we skimped on the cement put
into the foundation? Have we tried to make mortar
without sand? (Page 76)
Were we resentful, selfish, dishonest or afraid? Do we owe an apology? Have
we kept something to ourselves which should be discussed with another person
at once? Were we kind and loving toward all? What could we have done better?
Were we thinking of ourselves most of the time? Or were we thinking of
The first three of these regard specific instructions from the Tenth Step (looking for the four negative qualites, talking to someone about them and correcting new mistakes). The other four are more general in nature. We are told "not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid reflection, for that would diminish our usefulness to others." (Page 86) Such feelings would frustrate the purpose of Steps Eight and Nine: "to be of maximum service to God and the people around us" (Page 77) When finished with our review we ask for forgiveness and ask what corrective measures should be taken.
what we could do for others, ofwhat we could pack into the stream of life? (Page 86)
On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the
day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced
from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ our
mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will
be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives. (Page 86)
We may face indecision in thinking about our day. "Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don’t struggle." (Page 86) This reminds us of one of the Ninth Step Promises regarding being able to intuitively handle situations that used to baffle us. Though we will not be inspired at all times, we find that "[w]hat used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind... [W]e find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration. We come to rely upon it." (Page 87) Concluding our meditation, "[w]e ask especially for freedom from self-will Thus, having entered the world of the Spirit by Step Ten, enabled by the spiritual qualities at the beginning of this Step and now these two definite and valuable suggestions, we can see possible relief ("daily reprieve"?) from Self-will - identified in Step Three as the source of our troubles. (Page 62) Meditation, in the sense used here, consists of thinking about our plans, asking for certain healthy attitudes and sitting quietly while awaiting an intuitive thought. The only concern appears to be our daily conduct and thought life and not some of the loftier topics often dealt with in organized religions.