Chapter Five - How It Works |
The authors sum up the opening section in this way:
(a) represents Step One; (b) and (c) together comprise Step Two of the program of recovery just outlined. The first four chapters discussed little else but Steps One and Two, though implicitly and with a view toward fostering belief in these ideas. This chapter and the next two offer explicit discussion and directions on the remaining ten Steps.
Step Three, the next section of this chapter, comes immediately after the the pertinent ideas. The authors begin: "Being convinced, we were at Step Three... The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success." (Page 60) There are more uses of 'self-' in this chapter than in any other part of the literature. An exposition of over two pages ensues on the source of the alcoholic's problems as the authors see it:
We must be rid of this selfishness, we are told, or it will kill us.
This is remarkably similar to a passage in the previous chapter (Pages 44-45). Where the earlier passage referred to needing God's help in overcoming alcoholism, the current one deals with overcoming self-will. Alcohol and drinking are not mentioned in this Step. Indeed, as prominent as it was in the previous chapters, alcohol is seldom mentioned in the 164 pages after this point, for we are on the path to recovery.
Taking the position that God will now be the director of our lives, and abandoning that role ourselves leads to very positive results for us, as described in the Third Step Promises on Page 63. This naturally follows from the belief in the futility of self-will at the beginning of this Step, and the discussion of this topic. The second element of this Step is the saying of the Third Step Prayer, the first of three prayers in the Big Book with suggested wording. "We thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready; that we could at last abandon ourselves utterly to Him." (Page 63) Notice the word "utterly" here, which again indicates dedication. The Step concludes: "This was only a beginning, though if honestly and humbly made, an effect, sometimes a very great one,
was felt at once." (Page 63)
There is no indication in the book that this Step should be repeated.
The chapter concludes with a lengthy discussion of Step Four. Of the ten Steps explicitly examined in the Big Book, the instructions in this one are second only to Step Twelve in length and detail (Step Nine - excluding the Promises - is nearly as long). Such is the emphasis placed on this Step.
Following on the heels of Step Three, the authors assert that we ought to undertake this Step quickly:
This appears to be the only time in the Steps that we are asked to progress quickly from one to the next. As the authors write in other places, "faith without works is dead." The statement that "liquor was but a symptom" is notable here, and is paraphrased at the end of Step Twelve (Page 103).
Step Four represents a "fact-finding and fact-facing process", not unlike a business taking inventory of its unusable stock. The words "character" and "defect" do not appear in this Step. We do see the word "flaws" and "faults", however, and these are identified clearly with self: "First, we searched out the flaws in our make-up which caused our failure. Being convinced that self, manifested in various ways, was what had defeated us, we considered its common manifestations." (Page 64) "being convinced" echoes the first requirement in Step Three (Page 60), and this conviction motivates the current inventory.
Resentment is the "number one offender" and thus is examined first. "We listed people, institutions or principles with whom we were angry. We asked ourselves why we were angry. In most cases it was found that our self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships (including sex) were hurt or threatened. So we were sore. We were 'burned up.'" (Pages 64-65) Resentments are "infinitely grave", the authors assert, "[f]or when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die... If we were to live, we had to be free of anger." (Page 66) Self, manifested in the form of resentments, is thus the source, not only of the alcoholic's problems in life, but of his drinking as well. Listing the objects of the resentments, the causes and how we are affected, we have the three columns shown in the example on Page 65. "We went back through our lives. Nothing counted but thoroughness and honesty." (Page 65) These same qualities are also named in the How It Works section of this chapter.
Looking at the list, "[w]e saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish them away anymore than alcohol. This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick." (Page 66) "We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend." (Page 67) It is even suggested here that we called the pray when angered by others, the second of three suggested prayers in the Big Book. This prayer conveys an idea similar to the frequent advice to pause in times of disturbance.
It is then suggested that we disregard others' part in the situations listed and concentrate on where we had been at fault. "Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self-seeking and frightened? ... Where were we to blame?" (Page 67) "When we saw our faults we listed them. We placed them before us in black and white. We admitted our wrongs honestly and were willing to set these matters straight." (page 67) The suggestion to list our faults provides the basis for modern Fourth Step worksheets to include four columns, instead of three, as in the Big Book example. Setting down our part, our actions and reactions, in past situations is the basis on which we later approach others to make amends. It should be noted here that in addition to helping get a clearer picture of past events, seeing how self-will on our part has contributed to these incidents probably also serves as a second way our anger toward others is reduced in this Step.
Noting that fear came up frequently in their example, the authors suggest an entirely separate inventory in this area. "This short word somehow touches about
every aspect of our lives. It was an evil and corroding thread..." (Page 67).
Echoing an idea from Step Three (page 62) and We Agnostics (Page 52-3), the next paragraph once again recommends reliance on God - the only healthy type of dependence endorsed in the Big Book - rather than our own will and human resources, this time to combat fear:
Treating sex and other problems alike implies practicing these principles when our desires for society and security are threatened as well as sex. Growing toward an ideal in all these areas hints at a change in attitude and outlook, a hallmark of spiritual awakening. Indeed, there is another set of promises near the end of this Step (Page 70) which outline more changes we can expect after performing it.
There is no indication in the book that this Step should be repeated.
The chapter concludes: "If you have already made a decision, and an inventory of your
grosser handicaps, you have made a good beginning. That being so you have swallowed and digested some big chunks of truth about yourself." (Page 71)
Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures
before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.
Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and
self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate.
Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably
find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on
self which later placed us in a position to be hurt. (Page 62)
Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we
could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither
could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying
on our own power. We had to have God's help. (Page 62)
Though our decision [to turn our life and will over] was a vital and crucial step,
it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a
strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had
been blocking us. Our liquor was but a symptom. So we had to get down to causes
and conditions. (emphasis added) (Page 64)
We reviewed our fears thoroughly. We put them on paper, even though we had no
resentment in connection with them . We asked ourselves why we had them. Wasn’t
it because self-reliance failed us? Self-reliance was good as far as it went,
but it didn’t go far enough. Some of us once had great self-confidence,
but it didn’t fully solve the fear problem, or any other. When it made us cocky,
it was worse. (Page 68)
Perhaps there is a better way— we think so. For we are now on a different
basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God
rather than our finite selves. We are in the world to play the role
He assigns. Just to the extent that we do as we think He would have us,
and humbly rely on Him, does He enable us to match calamity with serenity. (Page 68)
Sex issues were troubling to enough of the authors that they feel the need to include another inventory solely on this topic.
We reviewed our own conduct over the years past. Where had we been selfish, dishonest,
or inconsiderate? Whom had we hurt? Did we unjustifiably arouse jealousy, suspicion or
bitterness? Where were we at fault, what should we have done instead? We got this all down
on paper and looked at it. (Page 69)
Whatever our ideal [on sex matters] turns out to be, we must be willing to grow toward it.
We must be willing to make amends where we have done harm, provided that we do not bring about
still more harm in so doing. In other words, we treat sex as we would any other problem. In
meditation, we ask God what we should do about each specific matter. The right answer will
come, if we want it. (Page 69)